I am not the kind of person to attend a still art show. I appreciate fashion shows and moving art. Maybe because I move constantly and don’t slow down enough to take it all in. So, when I take the elevator up to the 5th floor at the Bendix building in DTLA, I am surprised at how moved I am standing still. The room is crowded, full of people standing around in the summer night heat with a slight breeze blowing through a fan in the window.
The artist, Catherine Just, is smartly dressed in an oversized blazer with the word LOVE embroidered on the back. She greets guests and takes selfies with a spirit conveying gratitude and warmth. She sees me and directs me toward a table in the entryway displaying her artist’s statement and bio.
Catherine is an award-winning LA-based artist who got clean and sober from meth addiction at the age of 18. For better or worse, she puts it out there in print. Before recounting her numerous accolades, her artist bio shows that recovery from addiction is a big piece of her life and inspiration. How fucking refreshing!
Yet I am most intrigued by this one line: “She has dedicated her life to a never-ending curiosity about the human condition specific to a relationship with dis-ease and connection and a deep desire to experience love.” A never-ending curiosity about the human condition. As a lifelong nurse, I resonate with this more than I can express. I am nodding my head as I read. I find myself just standing still in the middle of a crowded room—I am taking it all in.
Foundational Elements
In the early part of her career, the artist spent years as an apprentice to Don Miguel Ruiz, the author of The Four Agreements. Ruiz taught the world simple yet life-changing statements about personal freedom and happiness, such as “take nothing personally” and “be impeccable with your word.” His book came out the year I graduated high school in 1997, and it soared in popularity due to its fresh and straightforward approach.
I can say the same about Catherine. She never minces words. In recovery circles, she taught me one of her personal mantras, which was to love myself no matter fucking what. #NMFW—I have scribbled it in journals and notebooks around my house in the days since. Catherine’s work with Ruiz was said to be one of the foundational elements of her art. Surrounded by these well-curated pieces of Catherine’s art, I can easily see that all the parts of her journey have come together to formulate her artistic expression. Her curiosity about the human condition and artistic prowess makes for a beautiful display.
The Space Between Words
Artist Statement by Catherine Just:
“Chasing Fog” is an exploration of love, loss, and what lives in between them. I’m investigating the unseen energy and unspoken narratives of fear, scarcity, nostalgia, worth, and desire that often live in the space between words. I’m using Self-Portraiture and Still Life images as symbols of what the heart hears, challenging the notion that we can keep ourselves safe from real or imagined danger.
Without the protection of frame and glass, it’s exposed and vulnerable, which leaves it open to being nicked, scraped, and ripped, a casualty of true connection. I’m using a vintage Polaroid SX-70 Camera and Black and White Polaroid film that has faded and yellowed over time, metaphoric of the old baggage we carry into every relationship. I’m bringing what’s uncomfortable and hanging it out to dry.
That is the recovery journey, I think. It’s beautiful, brutal, and raw as we peel back the layers of the proverbial onion. When I leave the exhibit and walk out into the night air to call an Uber, I feel tears of gratitude roll down my face. Experiences such as this are forever woven into the fabric of my recovery story, and I continue to learn how to bring what’s uncomfortable and hang it out to dry from those who came before me, like Catherine, who has been sober for over three decades. That seems to be how we heal, regardless of what we chase.
Follow Catherine Just Artist | Photographer | Mentor | Mama to Max
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